I’ve learned to switch my anxiety off in under 15 seconds. Here’s how you can too.

DISCLAIMER: I’m about to share the most effective, efficient, and reliable anxiety-reducing technique I’ve ever encountered. However, until I understood its mechanism and rationale, I spent years dismissing it as silly pseudo-science. With this in mind, I urge you not to skim this post. By taking the time to fully understand its concept, you'll be more likely to implement it and reap its full benefits.

PLEASE NOTE: I suffer from situational / anticipatory anxiety. I do not suffer from chronic anxiety or panic attacks. Thus, I can't speak for this techniques effectiveness regarding these conditions.

THE TECHNIQUE

Whenever you're confronted with emotions such as nervousness, dread, or anxiety, do the following:

1. Firmly declare to yourself: “I’m not [insert emotion here], I’m excited.”
2. Repeat the affirmation, alternating it slightly. After 10 or so repetitions, you’ll notice a positive shift in your emotions. This shift is often likened to a surge of warmth, happiness, or wellbeing. It’s a subtle feeling that begins in your chest or stomach. Once this occurs, proceed to step 3.
3. Personalise it. Continue repeating and alternating your affirmation, and add situation specific context. With each affirmation, consciously improve the conviction of your delivery (say it like you mean it).

Example:

1. “I’m not nervous, I’m excited.”

2. “I’m not feeling nervous, I’m feeling excited.” 

“I’m feeling amped up right now.” 

“It’s good to feel this excited.” 

“I am buzzing with excitement right now.”

3. "I’m not nervous about this date, I’m excited to practise my communication skills.” 

“I’m not anxious about meeting her, I’m excited to see if we’re well suited.”

“Tonight is going to be a great night.” 

“No matter the outcome, tonight is a great learning opportunity.”

THE SCIENCE

The subconscious mind plays a pivotal role in determining how we feel. When we experience a particular emotion, it's because our subconscious has deemed it the most appropriate physiological state to match our situation.

Here's where it gets interesting: the subconscious mind has no perception of the outside world. Instead, it relies on information gathered by our conscious mind. However, this exchange of information isn’t a perfect science. After all:

Sometimes our conscious mind is wrong

And as a result, our subconscious makes us feel situationally-inappropriate emotions.

Example: 

You're sitting in a bar and you think a strange man is staring at you from across the room. Your conscious mind relays this information to your subconscious, and in response, you begin to feel paranoid and defensive. As the night progresses, you keep your guard up, perhaps even avoiding eye contact or thinking of ways to confront this dude. Eventually you notice there's a TV right behind you. It dawns on you that this guy wasn't staring at you at all – he was watching the TV. Despite this realisation, you've already spent a significant amount of time feeling unnecessarily defensive and uneasy, all because of a misinterpretation by your conscious mind.

Sometimes our subconscious mind misinterprets things

Examples: 

After a shitty day at work, you hear a song that reminds you of a great night out with your mates. You suddenly feel happy, even though your environment hasn't changed. This is because your subconscious mind has misinterpreted the cue from the song as being from the present moment.

You feel a touch on your shoulder and jump, thinking it might be someone trying to get your attention in a forceful way. In reality, it was just a friend tapping you lightly, but your subconscious misinterpreted the touch based on past experiences or a heightened state of alert.

You've just been studying about a particular illness in school or watched a documentary about it. Later, you feel a slight headache or some minor symptom, and you suddenly worry you might have that illness. Your subconscious, influenced by recent information, might misinterpret common sensations as signs of the disease.

Our subconscious mind can’t differentiate between real and fake

Examples:

Reading a touching story or novel can make you cry or feel emotional, even though the characters and events are fictional. Your subconscious reacts to the emotional narrative as if it were a real-life event.

On your way home, you spot a billboard showcasing a delicious pizza. Just seeing the image makes your mouth water and creates hunger pangs in your stomach, even though there's no actual food nearby. Your subconscious reacts to the image as if it were the real thing.

WHY THE TECHNIQUE WORKS

The fact that our subconscious mind influences our emotions and that it’s unable to differentiate between real and fake means that we have the power to control how we feel.

Thus, when you’re anxious or nervous, if you repeatedly tell yourself you’re excited, your subconscious will eventually start believing it, and your emotional state will change accordingly.

WHY EXCITED? WHY NOT CALM?

You've likely heard the advice when you're anxious or nervous: "Breathe deeply and think positive thoughts." The intention behind this guidance is to mimic the behaviour of someone who's calm. This is done in hopes that if you act calm, your subconscious mind will be convinced that you indeed are, leading your body to react by lowering your anxiety levels.

However, there's a challenge to this approach. Anxiety and calmness are at two extreme ends of the emotional continuum. Given their stark differences, it's quite a leap for your subconscious to quickly transition from a state of anxiety to one of calmness, especially after experiencing an intense situation. By the time your mind processes and believes this change, and your body begins to feel genuinely calm, considerable time may have passed. And the lengthier the transition of emotional states, the more prone you are to allowing doubting thoughts to creep in, reversing the transition, and bringing you back toward anxiousness.

On the other hand, excitement shares many physiological characteristics with anxiety: an increased heart rate, sweaty palms, heightened alertness, and a surge of energy. By affirming, "I’m not nervous, I’m excited," you’re not trying to make a drastic emotional leap. You’re simply reinterpreting a sensation that’s already present. This makes the transition from anxiety to excitement swift and painless.

THINGS TO KEEP IN MIND

Practice makes progress 

Many clients have abandoned this technique after 2 or 3 lazily executed attempts. It took me at least 2 weeks of daily practice to really start feeling the benefits of this technique. Keep practising.

Ignore your inner dialogue

When I first tried this technique, I was met with a great deal of resistance from my inner dialogue.

Me: “I’m not nervous, I’m excited.”

My inner dialogue: ‘Not you’re not, you’re nervous.’

This is natural when you first start out. But fear not, over time, as you continue refining your pitch, and begin experiencing the technique's benefits, that doubting voice will quieten down.

Don’t try to go from 0-100

Begin practising this technique in anticipation of low-stakes anxiety inducing situations. Stuff like making a phone call, choosing what to wear, or deciding where to eat. As you gain confidence, you can begin applying it to higher-stakes situations, like public speaking, approaching an attractive stranger, or attending a job interview.

Treat the technique like an acting audition

The effectiveness of this technique relies on how convincingly you deliver it. As such, pretend it’s your job to convince a casting director that your character is excited. Speak with conviction, enthusiasm, and passion. Raise your voice, and really believe in what you’re saying. 

Your words are only half the story

Amp it up by letting your body join in. Stand tall, pull your shoulders back, lift your chin, and use your hands. Think of how animated people get when they talk about something they love and replicate that behaviour.